I May Need to Change The Name of My Blog!
24 February 2014
Oy vey! It's been several months since I wrote and posted a new blog topic, and I have just spent several hours getting my blogger skills cranked up again. I wasn't on hiatus spending meditative moments in Fiji contemplating my belly button...I was dealing with the messy parts of life. I closed out 2013 going through my 3rd divorce, grappling with being an empty-nester whose child can rarely communicate with me since she's touring Europe, selling off or giving away 90% of my worldly possessions, leaving my "fun" job to move back to my hometown for a great new adventure, leaving lovely friends behind, having to foster my canine children with dear cousins, and learning the ugly truth that agism is alive and well.
Over the past 3 years, I've gone from owning a large home in a nice gated community to scaling back to live in a ghetto one-bedroom apartment in Orlando to living in one room. While it's a temporary situation, living in my parents' home at age 58 was not where I thought I'd be at this stage in life. Sometimes it feels like a short slide down Maslow's Hierarchy of Needs to the bottom rung.
And now, I discovered that the blog name I pondered so thoughtfully and considered a unique statement on my philosophy is commonplace. Just google "not done yet" and see what comes up! Lots! I may need to change the name of my blog...not just because others cleverly thought it up too, but because doubts about the future cause my mind to muse about if it's actually a true statement of me. Do I really believe that I'm "not done yet," or am I fighting a battle to stay in the paddock and not be put out to pasture?
Recently I was visiting London, and, most days, I had to explore it on my own. I used to enjoy my own company and it didn't bother me at all to be singular. I don't know if it was the cold weather or the gloomy skies there, but I felt so alone among throngs of people. I felt invisible. I felt "done."
As I close this blog topic, I wax melancholy and contemplative. Am I "not done yet" or am I "done" and just have to realize and embrace it? Have you faced this cross road? What did you decide — "done" or "not done?"
Many blessings, Missy
A rose bush.....covered with "spent" blossoms. Is that all there is to the life of this organism? Of course not. But the faded glory of the plant's "yesterdays" is what is most visible.
ReplyDeleteSearch through the thorns....those parts of the plant that both protect the flowers, but wound the intruders.....and small buds with tomorrow's potential are found. They are not fully developed yet, but they
Thank you, Lucy-Kate! I love the analogy of the rose bush and then organic references. It's great to remember that I,too, am an organic creature with life seasons. You've given me some treasured nuggets of wisdom on while to meditate!
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